Just like with anything else out there, there’s a balance we should look for when it comes to sexual activities. Sure, we all love making sweet, sweet love, and it’s common to have it on our minds most of the time. However, it can backfire and negatively affect us, leaving lasting consequences on our private and professional lives.
Similar to drug or alcohol abuse, we can become addicted to sex and allow it to hold us back from enjoying our lives. If you or someone you care for has issues with how sexual activities preoccupy their time, allow us to list and explain some sex addiction patterns. We’ll hopefully get you back on track or inspire you to seek professional help.
The Need for Professional Help
The reality is that we often consider ourselves or someone we know to be sex addicts. Yet, this couldn’t be farther from the truth. Loving to sleep with people and changing partners constantly isn’t necessarily the sign of having a problem. At least not in this story. It’s, therefore, important to immediately state how infidelity and promiscuity aren’t the same as being addicted to sexual intercourse.
So, what is it, then? Well, understanding sex addiction isn’t just knowing that some people love fun between the sheets more than others. Sex addiction is a compulsive disorder. It manifests in people losing control over their bodies. As such, they’re unable to stop pursuing intercourse even if they know it will affect them negatively. This can, unfortunately, lead them to both legal and health issues like rape and STIs.
Sex addicts frequently have a hard time living a normal life. Their addiction interferes with job obligations and relationships, both romantic and professional. And just like drug or alcohol abuse, this addiction can make people forget about their responsibilities or even behave destructive just so they can enjoy a fix — have sex.
Fortunately, there are ways of beating this disorder with professional help. But before one can do so, it’s essential to understand common sex addiction patterns. So, let’s go through some of them now, shall we?
Unsafe Sexual Activities
People suffering from this addiction usually practice unsafe sex. Unlike, for example, teens who aren’t aware of what can happen if they have intercourse with strangers or without protection, addicts just can’t help it. They know the dangers but overlook them. The lure of sleeping with others is so strong that they’ll do anything. But what are unsafe sex activities? Well, aside from doing the deed without a rubber, there are others we tend to neglect for various reasons.
A common unsafe sexual practice is mouth-to-genital activity — unhygienic oral. On the other hand, there’s always having sex with multiple partners. Sure, there’s nothing wrong with not having an official partner, but it’s risky to sleep with people who lay down with people you don’t know.
In short, sex addicts don’t have any problems with sleeping with high-risk people. These risky lovers are fishy about their health, sleep with strangers, or just don’t care if they pass something on to others.
Another common sex addiction pattern is compulsive dating. Namely, addicts tend to control their partners, making things unhealthy and toxic. But why do they do it? Well, some psychologists suggest that this is due to the fear of losing the opportunity to have sex, not their partner. So for them to make sure that the other person won’t just sit up and leave, they do everything and anything in their power to make them stay.
Being compulsive when it comes to dating is a difficulty in itself. However, if you add sex addiction to it, it becomes even worse. The thing is, any amount of love and care couples have for one another goes away if the only thing that holds them together is one person’s need to satisfy their sexual needs. Compulsiveness is a perfect example of how sex addiction doesn’t just affect addicts themselves but others as well.
Equating Love With Sex
Love is great. All of us can agree on that, right? Unfortunately, sex addicts usually misidentify it with sex to explain their behavior. They either lie to themselves or others so that they can have even more intimate contact. This is, again, something that doesn’t just affect them but others as well. It manipulates other people’s feelings, messes their brains up, altering how they view life, love, and sex.
Sex doesn’t have to be involved for love to exist. We can’t define love so easily. It’s what we feel for others, and it can have a different meaning for any one of us. On the other hand, sex is a physical act. It’s what we do to procreate, and there’s no need to have affection for the person you do it with. Some sex addicts, unfortunately, don’t understand this, justifying their constant sexual activities as a search for the big L.
Casual Cheating With Multiple Partners
As if infidelity wasn’t bad in the first place, sex addiction can mix with it, making things even worse. But people often mistake cheating and being addicted to sexual intercourse for one another. In reality, seeing other people behind someone’s back can occur due to a bad relationship. On the other hand, cheating because of sex addiction can happen even if the addict gets everything from their official partner.
Regardless of how caring and loving their partner is, addicts will pursue others to have more and more sex. Alas, the need for sexual activities of these people is so strong that others who don’t suffer from this disorder simply can’t catch up with them. Sex addicts won’t say no to advances from strangers in bars and clubs, office romances, and pretty much anyone they meet during the day.
Porn and Cybersex Obsession
The sad reality is that sex junkies will stop at nothing to satisfy their addiction. That means enjoying anything carnal — from pornographic content to chatting about getting it on with strangers online. Sure, porn and online romances are not inherently bad. However, both of them can lead to unforeseen consequences.
Did you ever catch yourself scrolling through porn, unable to decide on a scene? Well, that can be a red light to watch out for. Even if only a few people will admit, porn is as addictive as anything else. After all, it is about sex, right? It can cause people to have unrealistic expectations from their bodies, their partners, and even spend excessive amounts of money to purchase exclusive content.
On the flip side, cybersex is another problem. From installing multiple dating apps to chatting with strangers on social media, sex addicts will do anything to feel more thrill. And even if none of these internet practices need to be dangerous, for people who struggle to control themselves, they usually become. For instance, sex junkies will pay or lend money to fake accounts in the hope of meeting them to exchange bodily fluids. But, unfortunately, none of this comes to be, leaving addicts broke and hopeless.
But like we’ve said, this disorder can be successfully treated. The best way to go about it is to seek professional help. Types of sex treatments vary from case to case. Therefore, if you or your loved one is having difficulties with compulsive sexual behavior, contact your doctor or local med group to schedule an appointment as soon as possible.